Chronicle of Asia (part 5)

Koh Samui, Koh Tao, Koh Nang Yuan and Ang Thong Marine Parc (Thailand) * ° *

The first to set foot on Koh Samui are a group of Chinese merchants whose boat, loaded with coconuts intended for sale in Thailand, deviated from its course to arrive on the island.
Yeah, it was a long time ago, since China has diversified its exports a little and the Thai grow their coconuts themselves, less profitable than making iPhones

Big lack of imagination, the Chinese in question baptized the island "first island that we saw", or "Samoï" (do not judge me on the spelling in old Chinese huh

Little little problem, in Thai the word samoi designates the hairs "from below", as the guide very modestly explains to us ...
Yes, the ones you shave or epilate so that they don't stick out of the bikini ...
Well, it was not very classy as a name so they changed a letter and this is the island of Samui

The revenge of rebellious children!
The first inhabitants of Koh Samui were Thai farmers living on the mountains.
These large families used to keep model children with them to take over the plantations.
As for the bad boys and bad girls, they were sent to the beaches where, at the time, there was nothing to do except to watch the coconuts grow while waiting for them to fall on your head ...
And then, 20, 30 years ago, tourists began to bring back their white buttocks to make them brown in the sun, more and more - some attracted by the beautiful Di Caprio strolling his tanned chest on Thai beaches in "The Beach" - and, ultimately, the bad boys and girls became richer than their cousins ​​left to cultivate in the land.

In Koh Samui, we found a nice hotel by the sea: bungalow, swimming pool, private beach, all more and more deserted as the last westerners are repatriated.
At first the staff were extremely nice and helpful, but the more the place becomes empty the more they try to earn money from all sides: make us raid for the breakfast that we have already paid, require 1500 bath more for washing sheets, ...

We still find a way to make some excursions: we take advantage of the last day of opening of the Ang Thong maritime national park, we visit the islands of Koh Tao and that of Nang Yuan: three tiny islets linked by strips of white sand who belong to a hotel complex installed there ...
Too bad for the wilderness.
Finally, we still have the incredible chance to see all these deserted places, the beaches are ours, the sea seems empty, the shops and restaurants cry after their disappeared clientele, ...
We not only took a trip in space but also in time: we walk the streets of Koh Samui then, without the herds of visitors, the hordes of noisy scooters and the uninterrupted party.
Just seaside villages where everything seems to have stopped.
In lack of western money, the locals start fishing and harvesting coconuts.

We also try a "jeep safari", which only has a safari the old military jeep with suspensions that have died since the 1940s Sitting on the bench on the roof, without belts, of course, or safety barrier, we pray for our life every time the car ventures at high speed on a rocky road, between ditch, bumps and potholes.
Downhill, we hang on to our hair hoping not to be ejected at the next turn, we shout a little, it's Walibi at will but without security, we laugh a lot especially

The jeep ride takes us to the 'grand father and grand mother rocks'.
Do you think this name shows respect for ancestors in Thai culture and blah blah blah?
Well no!
It's just a rock in the shape of a cock and another in the shape of a serious cat.
The story would come from the fact that a while or a certain time ago, an entire family sailed to Samui in order to marry their daughter.
The grandparents, living on the island, had found the ideal party for him!
Little problem - there's always one in these stories - big fucking storm on the horizon
The navigators try as best they can to get closer to the coast to deliver the future bride to her promised and there, bam!
a rock (not the one in the shape of sex no, a beast rock in the shape of a rock) comes off, falls on the boat and ... abuts everyone Oops!
So, I did not really understand the relationship between the rock-penis, the rock-vagina and the tragic death of an entire family but hey ... we will say that it is a kind of homage a little twisted to the big -parents who were waiting for them

Then, we go to the highest point of the island where a giant Buddha contemplates the horizon for eternity, surrounded by the twelve statues representing the years according to Thai astrology.
Dog, rabbit, dragon, cat, snake, ...
Same principle as the Chinese calendar but another choice of critters.
As the Thai say: "same same but different".

Experience rather boosted, If I dare say, at this place is also a kind of museum on the roof of which you can climb to have a 360 ° view, even higher than the highest point of the island, sétipa la class that ?!
We meet a monk doing work and there, Vince, who walks glued to his smartphone to take photos, puts his bare foot (shoes prohibited in all these places) on a rather bare electric cable too.
Discharge guaranteed with, behind, the monk who laughs like a kid while my poor lover screams in pain while holding his foot.
Here is one who must have said that Buddha had just given a good lesson to this western addict to technology: by dint of having your nose glued to the screen rather than your eyes around you, baaaaah, you pick up in your mouth.
And, I swear, the monk's laugh was so honest and devoid of all wickedness that we all started to laugh too haha.

Still in the Buddhist mood, we will present our tributes to a monk who has died for 45 years.
The guy died in meditation and his body was mummified all by himself (except his eyes, which have rotten, if you want all the details) ...
Suddenly the inhabitants of the village put it under glass in the state ... they just added sunglasses that give it a little air of rock star in a dressing gown (yes, to hide rotten eyes , the )...
Lo and behold, a very pious monk - or one who had eaten American full of preservatives all his life - poses for eternity in the small glass cage of the temple.

I try a "fortune teller game" which consists in shaking wooden sticks until one of them comes out of the pot.
You then look at the number marked above which corresponds to a small text on your future.
Eh beeeeen, number 26 is not joy eh.
I put the text in the photo but, basically, my life is shit and, incidentally, if I want it to improve, I "can" make some hard and stirring offerings at the temple Ilébo le futuuuur

The Ang Thong Maritime National Park is home to, among other things, the island where the handsome Di Caprio went wild in the film "The Beach".
Well, I tell you right away, no fields of wild cannabis or hippie camps ...
Just a dead guy floating in the lagoon that prevented us from going to swim there, idiot! (decidedly, a mummified monk, a deceased bather, it's a bit of news in my chronicle this time).

On another island in the park: a makeshift climbing session in little beach slippers.
Basically, you climb on the rock while praying a little so that the rope to which you hang is well knotted and not too worn, without being insured or anything, all this for a good half hour to a cave including one part is open to the sky.
Cannon

On the return, the news fell: it was the last day of opening of the maritime national park.
There's the lucky star of travelers who stalke me, I think

So much for our beginnings in Koh Samui